WW

*Note*  I haven't shared this information with many people... in fact I'm willing to bet two people know the details I'm about to share, but in hopes of sharing that it might help me see and realize what I have done and get back on track.

Last Tuesday I decided to make the jump to make a commitment to getting back on track with my weight, once and for all, and I went to my first WW meeting.  

Picture taken within the first few months of us dating (HELLO - WAKE UP CALL)

My sophomore year of college when T and I started dating, I weighed between 135-140.  Since my sophomore year of college, I have gained/lost/fluctuated about 30-35 lbs over the course of 5 years.  Of course I immediately thought years ago it was all because of my White Chocolate Mocha obsession in the winter and my Frappuccino obsession in the summer.... so I started drinking regular coffee and I'm pretty sure I might have lost a alb (maybe 2 if I was lucky).  Over the next 4-5 years I would do what most Americans do... yoyo dieting.  I wouldn't say that I ever "dieted" but more of less just watched what I put in my mouth for a period of time and work my butt off (literally) until I saw the scale go down 10 lbs and I'd think to myself "See M, this isn't that hard, you can go out to dinner tonight with friends" and that right there is my biggest problem.  I would get to one of my mini goals and pretty much slack off.  

As I have mentioned throughout my blog when New Year's rolled around I told myself that I was going to get back on track by working out at least 4 days a week and eating "healthier" foods.  I did good through about March and then came trips, family in town, and our anniversary.... and it kinda stopped there.  I had lost 9 lbs without having to really "change" my lifestyle and then summer came and don't you know I pretty much gained every bit of it back but 3 lousy lbs!?!  

Fast forward about a month and I turned 25, a quarter century, probably over a quarter of my life (let's be honest people, how many of us are living to 100?).  It hit me that I am not going to "let" myself go and I wanted to do something about it.  Then two weeks after my Birthday, my Aunt Rox came down, she joined WW over 7 years ago and lost around 90 lbs and has been a lifetime member every since she reached her goal.  While she was here we went walking every morning and I asked her a lot of questions on WW and explained that what I had been doing wasn't working for me.  She never pushes or asks anyone about their weight or trying to be a spokesperson for WW in any way, shape or form.  The Monday after she left I was sitting at work and I felt my jeans being tight, these jeans were only a few months old, and I tried to tell myself it was because I had just washed/dried them the night before.... but it hit me.  It was because of everything I had put in my mouth.  

Last Tuesday I called and prepaid my membership over the phone.  I called and paid over the phone in advance before the meeting so I wouldn't talk myself out from going after I got home from work.  I was able to print off my temporary pass and I went to a 7pm meeting, arriving 30 minutes in advance to get set up and weighed in for the first time.  I'm not going to lie, I weighed myself at home so I wouldn't be in any kind of shock when I went to WW that night.  I was 172.4 (I liked that it was .7 less than my scale, lol).  It was a reality check.  I went and sat down and waiting for the meeting to start in 15 minutes, give or take.  The lady that was the leader has lost over 95 lbs herself and has been a lifetime member for over 16 years.  I'm going to be honest, at first I kinda felt like I was in an AA meeting, except for food.  I didn't speak or ask questions since this was all new to me.  There were a lot of ideas shared, new WW deserts that had been released, and a member reached her ultimate goal and became a lifetime member.  I stayed after for one of their power sessions which goes over the program and the leader will answer any questions that might arise during the session.  I went home and felt overwhelmed... everything that I would put in my mouth would have a point value associated with it.  

What I learned after the first visit:  I came home and looked up what some of my favorite restaurant meals point values.... and pretty much crossed them off my list!  Some of my favorite dishes had more points in a serving than I am supposed to eat in two days.  Granted, when I did go out and eat these foods I would take half of the portion home with me, but that would still be my entire points for the day!  Shocking.  

Meeting numero dos:  I was very anxious about weighing in at 6:30 at night.  Of course anyone is going to be heavier at night than they are when they first wake up in the morning.  I stepped on the scale and the woman weighing me in smiled and congratulated me, I had lost 3.4 lbs!  I was proud of myself, but also thought that if I hadn't saved my "allowance points" for wine two nights that I probably would've lost much more.  The second meeting was preparing for Thanksgiving (8 weeks away...which means Christmas is only 12 weeks away! eek).  I didn't speak any at this meeting either, and I'm almost embarrassed to speak.  One person raised her hand and said that she jogged a mile, that is a big accomplishment for her and I'm thrilled she has worked her way up to that, but I can run 3 miles.... just doing it is the problem.... I feel like someone like me who is capable of doing things shouldn't be in WW to begin with... I didn't want to share that I ran 2 miles before coming to the meeting then because I didn't want her to feel bad or less accomplished.  I left the meeting knowing that if I only had one night of wine (maybe only 3 glasses) and managed to fit in more workouts that I could do MUCH better on the scale.  

All in all WW hasn't been "hard" for me the first week.  I haven't had any "bad" cravings that I couldn't satisfy while still staying within my daily points for the day.  I've learned that social settings are going to be my hardest part because there is so much food around and drinking.  

I hope to stay between at a 2-3 lbs loss each week.  I know this is a big goal and I also know that there are going to be many challenges coming up (like my cousin's wedding next weekend).  With the weather cooling off I hope I can fit in time to go walking at lunch or after work and even a couple runs after work before it gets dark... of course life gets in the way of that too sometimes.  I'm fully prepared for the weeks when I only lose a 1/2lb or even nothing at all, because I'm aware and I know what a plateau is and I will just have to learn how to overcome it!